“A human lifespan is, on average, 79 years. In that time a person on average eats 479 fish fingers, takes 7163 baths, sheds 121 pints of tears, dreams 104,390 dreams, goes through 1033 chickens, buys 733 balloons and spends £658 stg on Christmas crackers. The average man will celebrate 76 birthdays, owns 15 ties and will spend a total of 144 days standing in front of a mirror shaving, produce enough sperm to hang 16 rolls of lining paper. The average woman will celebrate 81 birthdays, owns between 40 and 50 pairs of shoes and will spend nearly two years in round the clock washing, styling and restyling her hair. And who would have thought that in the UK the Tooth Fairy currently has a turnover of more than £20 million?

 

The Average Life of the Average Person – How it all Adds up is a great read. It’s much more than something interesting for the loo. There’s about 100 Chapters ranging from:

Baked Beans – of which you will eat 1,094 tins.

The Lottery – the odds of winning the Lottery are 14,000,000 to 1, which means that you are more likely to be killed by a tram on your way to collect you winnings.

Hangovers – you will live 32 days of your life as a vomiting sack of pain and hundreds more just being miserable.

It also has chapters on The Pill, Cows, Junk Mail, Lawyers and a most interesting one on Bananas.

Buy it HERE

(Via Paddy)